February 12, 2006 at 10:15 pm #1684AnnabellaParticipant
Bless me father for I have sinned.
It?s damn cold in my little home where darkness prevails bathed in an unnatural fear.
Forgive me Lord, for I don?t mean to offend you or anyone else.
Is it so wrong to use the natural talent I have been blessed with to give me warmth on a chilly Sunday evening? The flames can wash over my hand and light my room. It?s light I can read the Bible by, Lord. For I cannot even afford candles anymore.
I made 15 Pound Sterling the other night and I used it to repay some of my debt and I even gave back to the poor, my Lord, I gave an entire Pound Sterling to the Father who watched me that night. That could have been money to warm my house with firewood, to buy candles and meat ? and chocolate. Oh Lord, how I loved the chocolates the nice coffee house owner gave me. They were on a pretty sterling silver platter all arranged in a circle. So many kinds. Caramel, my Lord. I wish you knew the taste, but, of course, you do, Almighty. Of course you do.
I am sinning even now. I know it. Imagining such treats outside my designated position. You have punished me, my Lord. You have swiped away my memories and given me a disease that has no name. You have made me sickly on a nightly basis and cursed me with this ability to manipulate the flame.
But, oh Lord, how it warms me on the cold nights. The fire. It?s so wicked in its magnificence.
There is a rhyme I was told. I don?t know by whom. Perhaps it was years ago. Perhaps it is a little bit of memory coming to me?
Some say the world will end in fire;
Some say in ice.
From what I’ve tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To know that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.
To me, the rhyme is a perfect example of what I?m feeling. The fire, you see, comes through me. And I make it perfect. It is nothing to be ashamed of. It is nothing I should run away from. I should embrace it. But what blasphemy those thoughts are!
The Angel of Music gave me the flame on a night I surely would have died. That is the only thing that makes sense. So I play my violin and I showcase it to the world.
A bit of pride, perhaps. A bit of overconfidence, for sure. I am not good enough for the symphony and never will be. A street urchin of lowly patronage, that is what everyone assumes about me. And that is the perception I have taken as well.
But, my Lord, I know the truth. The truth is that at one point, I was grander. I was a good man with a good family and the Angel of Music looked over me then even as the Angel does now.
But Bless me Father for I, indeed, have sinned. I have, indeed, decided that my powers are a gift and not a sin. For so many things have been taken away from me. That on a cold night such as this, there must be one good thing to have come from you.
Forgive me Lord, I do not mean to be so presumptuous as to tell you what I feel or what should happen to me.
But the Cold, Father. The cold takes me. And if I wait too long, in the middle of the night, a thug will surely knock me out and steal my new boots. I try not to cry, my Lord, please give me that much. Please, also, Father, don?t take away my gift. You?ve taken away so much. I know it is for sins in the past. But, eventually, maybe, I will earn your redemption. And, perhaps, you shall give me some of my memory back.
Forgive me in my sins. Forgive me in my trespasses. And, together, Lord, we shall get through this.
a men.February 12, 2006 at 10:42 pm #2253Jeff CrowleyParticipant
It’s good to see your work again. ::smiles:: well done.February 12, 2006 at 11:45 pm #2254CatherineParticipant
Ah, child, sinning despite your better judgment. *shakes head* We’ll fix that yet… *eg*February 13, 2006 at 8:45 pm #2256ArianrhodParticipant
ladies and gentleman…this board has officially arrived….AWESOME post my manFebruary 14, 2006 at 8:47 pm #2257Helen FollmerMember
Oh that was sooo good! I look forward to seeing more of this character in the room as well as on the boards, keep up the great work.
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